


Welcome Home

by WinterReadingerDixon67



Series: Marvel OneShots [24]
Category: Marvel, Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Bucky Barnes Feels, F/M, Family Feels, Feels, Light depression, Steve Rogers Feels, so many feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-11
Updated: 2016-12-11
Packaged: 2018-09-07 22:40:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8818936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinterReadingerDixon67/pseuds/WinterReadingerDixon67
Summary: Bucky decides to go back under, but he took home with him, leaving you behind.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).



> Requested by Hawk_Momma, based off the song Welcome Home by Joy Williams. (I advise you to listen to this while reading it). Thank you hun for requesting it, I hope it's okay. 
> 
> I cried so hard when I listened to this song. I played it on repeat while I wrote this, there are so many feels in here you might need some tissues by you.

_Hello, I’ve been waiting for you_

_I didn’t know if you’d recognize my voice_

_Cause I’ve been whispering your name again and again_

_I’ve been imagining this day and I’ll never be the same_

“No, no, no, no, no, y-you can’t do this to me, James. I just got you back, h-how am I supposed to live w-without you?” Your voice cracked as you stood in front of him. Your Bucky, the love of your life, has decided to go back into cryo. Despite your numerous protests. He never even looked at you, keeping his gaze locked on the floor.

“I can't trust my own mind. So, until they figure out how to get this stuff out of my head…I think going back under is the best thing. For everybody. For you.” He spoke up after a few moments. You scoffed at him, his head jerked up at your reaction.

“How the fuck is it better for me, James? Please, enlighten me, how this is better. What am I supposed to do without you?”

“Move on. Find someone else to fall in love with, (Y/N), don’t wait for me. Don’t love me anymore, I’m not worth any of the love you have for me. So please, stop loving me.” You faltered back a few steps, tears hitting the floor.

“Bucky, pl-“

“Doll, please,” he stopped you with his hand, “I think you should just leave. Go enjoy life while you still can.” He turned his face from you, pain evident in his features, but the tears never fell from his blue eyes. With a shaky breath, you turned to leave, glancing one last time at the man you loved so dearly. His shoulders trembled slightly, trying so hard not to break before you. Turning away, you ran to your room, passing Steve, Sam, T’Challa, and Wanda.

“(Y/N)? You okay?” Steve asked you.

“Just leave me alone!” You slammed the door, locking it, sliding down the door, snd curling your knees to your chest. You screamed into the void, asking why this had to happen.

Grabbing the closest thing beside you, you threw it across the room hitting a picture frame on the desk, shattering it. Swearing under your breath, you stood up and went to pick it up. Only to have your world come crashing down on you once more. It was of your first date together. You met him in Romania while he was on the run. You were the first person he trusted and you had helped him every step of the way. He had taken you to a secluded spot he found in Romania, where the stars shone brightly. He kissed you for the first time that night, under the stars. You’ve been together ever since. That was until Hydra decided to show up a month ago and trigger him, bringing Winter back. Making him almost kill you, Steve was able to snap him out of it, but he was never the same after that.

So you were on the run with Bucky, Steve, Sam, and Wanda. You all ended up in Wakanda, under the protection of King T’Challa.

Your chest tightened when you got the news that he decided to go back under. You had to hear it from a random staff member. Bucky never even decided to tell you himself. Not wanting you to get hurt even further, which was a bunch of bullshit.

You traced the smile on his face, wishing you could go back to the days where the days were simpler, life was good, and Bucky was happy.

“(Y/N)?” You turned to Steve, he didn’t look so good either, after having to say goodbye to his friend. Again.

“H-He’s?” Steve nodded, your chest began to heave, as you struggled to breathe. You would’ve fallen to the floor if Steve wasn’t there to catch you. You clung to your best friend.

“He’s gone! I-I can’t, Steve, I c-can’t….” T’Challa, Sam, and Wanda stood in the doorway watching the two former Avengers break down in each other’s arms. Wishing they could take your pain away but knew they couldn’t. T’Challa knew he had a job to do. He was going to find a way to free Barnes’ mind from the clutches of Hydra. Hoping they could find a solution soon.

**_Two Years Later_ **

All four of you were welcomed back to the United States, no longer wanted criminals. Steve and Tony made amends, coming to terms with each other. He invited you all over back to the compound for a get together with the rest of the team. However, it didn’t feel the same. There was one person who should’ve been there.

_Welcome home_

_Welcome home_

_It’s so good to see your face_

_Welcome home_

Everyone welcomed you back home with open arms, it was nice to see them again. But they weren’t the faces you desperately wanted to see. While living in Wakanda, you couldn’t bring yourself to go see him. You tried to, but it was difficult, not to mention painful when all you could do was talk to a frozen tube. Knowing you’d never get a response. You stared off into space, not even registering when your fellow teammates called your name.

You missed his arms around you. Keeping you warm during the cold nights in Romania, sleeping on the worn down mattress. You missed the way he’d shower you with kisses in the morning, whispering the words ‘I love you’ over and over again. You missed the way he pulled you against him when he needed physical contact. You missed the late nights when you’d both dance to your own music, content on just dancing to the quiet. But now, now you felt empty. No one was there to keep you warm at night. To wake you up with kisses, to tell you they loved you. You were empty. Hollow. Alone. But you still loved him, you couldn’t move on. No one was Bucky, no one could ever replace your James.

You run to the room Tony had set up to you and frantically tear off your clothes. Yanking on the clothes you stole from Bucky’s closet all those years ago. Needing to be surrounded by his scent again. You curled onto the bedspread, holding the pillow to your chest, wishing it was Bucky you were holding onto. But it never was. And it never would be. He was gone, he was gone and there was little hope he would ever be coming back.

_We dance and sometimes only fall_

_We sing even when there are no words_

_And I hope love lifts you up again and again_

_And if you ever lose your way, let me be the first to say_

**_Three Months Later_ **

You were sitting outside in the rain, wearing the same clothes you wore for the past two days. Today marked, well would’ve marked your fourth anniversary with Bucky. It’s been two years and three months since he went under. The days never got any better, in fact, they just got worse. You were falling, you only had a small amount of time left before you fell to the point where no one would be able to bring you back. But you didn’t care, your life was gone. Why should anyone care about it anyways? Bucky sure didn’t. But you still loved him.

That’s how the team found you, sitting on the lawn facing the woods, whispering Bucky’s name over and over again. The same picture clutched in your hands, Bucky’s red Henley sticking to your soaked frame. Natasha removed the picture from your chilled hands, as Steve bent down and picked you up. You sobbed against Steve’s chest, screaming Bucky’s name into the dark sky. Asking him why he left you. You screamed until your throat became sore. Not sure how much more of this empty life you could take. You missed his face, the only reminder you had of what it looked like was the one picture. You were starting to forget the way his voice sounded. How it rumbled deep inside his chest when he laughed, how it softly brought you back from nightmares, but you no longer heard it.

“I’m s-starting to f-forget him, Steve, I c-can’t forget about him. I-I need him, S-Steve, I need him back.” That night, Wanda and Nat laid beside you as you slept, singing you soft lullabies. Steve stood in the doorway with Sam and Tony, phone in hand. He knew what he needed to do, he just wished he did it sooner.

_Welcome home_

_Welcome home_

_It’s so good to see your face_

_Welcome home_

Two days later, you were standing back on Wakanda soil. Back in the place where Bucky was staying. The pain still lingered, but you felt home. Home was wherever your James was and that was all that mattered. T’Challa met everyone at the main door of the palace. The whole team decided to come with, giving you the support you needed.

It didn’t take long for everyone to get settled, but it only took four more days until T’Challa informed you of Bucky’s progress. They were able to remove every last trigger word from his mind. He was finally free from Hydra, he was finally coming back. Your James was coming back to you. Tears of joy ran down your face, you couldn’t wait to be back in his arms. Hear your name fall from his lips. You couldn’t wait to hear those three words once again.

So there you stood, in the same spot since the early hours of the morning. Standing in front of the frozen glass case that concealed him. He looked so good. The light dusting of the stubble on his face, hair pulled back, lips you longed to kiss. The gentle callused hand that held you close at night. You brought your hand up to your cheek, closing your eyes, imaging his hand brushing against your skin. Remembering the way it contrasted with your smooth skin. Opening your eyes, you stepped closer to the glass, tracing his features with your hand. Desperately wanting to feel his skin against the palm of your hand.

Steve and the rest of the team watched from the opposite side of the glass as you brought your hand up to hover over where his face was. Fresh tears making their way down your pale face. T’Challa and his team made their way into the room to begin the defrosting process. You stood off to the side, wrapping your arms tightly around yourself. Chest beginning to tighten at the realization that your James was coming back to find out you never moved on. Never fell in love again, but instead spent a little over two years fighting to keep your love for him alive. To keep yourself alive.

_Come inside from the cold and rest your weary soul_

_You belong, you are loved, you are wanted_

_You’re not alone_

_I’ve missed you so_

The glass door slid down, his chest began to rise and fall steadily. They helped him onto the table and checked his vital signs. Doing any last minute checkups. He was right there, right in front of you and you couldn’t breathe. You were almost tempted to run out of the room and leave altogether, but the empty void you felt began to fill again when you realized he was finally home. T’Challa spoke a few quiet words to him, you noticed Bucky’s back tense and straighten. You were afraid he was angry at you, finding out what you’ve been doing all this time. With a quick nod, T’Challa left the room, leaving you alone with Bucky.

He stood down from the table, slowly turning towards you. His eyes widened when he took in your frame. Your skin was pale, eyes red and swollen, sleep deprivation evident in your features. The tears that once filled his eyes before, came down like waterfalls.

“(Y/N), w-why didn’t you just move on? W-Why would you hurt yourself like this?” His voice broke, regret on his face. He hated the way he left things between the two of you. This was the thing he wanted to avoid, he never meant to cause you pain, but he was wrong. He hurt you in the way he feared.

“B-Because life wasn’t the same w-without you, James. I-I was never the same without y-you. P-Please don’t leave m-me again, James, please.” Your lips quivered as you tried to keep yourself together, but failed. Bucky wasted no time rushing towards you. He wrapped his right arm around you, pulling you to his firm chest. The dams broke then. All the pain you felt, tears you’ve been holding back, crashing down the protective walls. You swung your hands around his neck, sobbing into his skin. Holding him tight against you, fearing he was going to be ripped away from you. He was finally back in your arms, your James, you loving James, was home.

You cried even harder when he whispered the three words you were anxious to hear once again, “I love you, (Y/N). I’m so sorry, I’m never leaving you again. I just didn’t want to hurt you, but it looks like I already did.” You cupped his face softly, running your hands along the stubble of his cheeks, taking in the rough feel of it against the palms of your hands.

“All that matters is that you’re finally back. I waited for you because I love you and I will never _stop_ loving you, James. My dear sweet James, my love, I finally have you back.” Your thumbs wiped the tears off his face, taking in every detail of his face again. “It’s so good to see your face. I missed you so much.”

His shoulders shook as he pulled your face to his, lips meeting yours. It felt just like your first kiss under the stars. Except for this time, you were home. He was your home. The team watched with wet eyes at the scene in front of them. You were finally back, smiling when Bucky ran his face down your neck, his scruff tickling you. The way his eyes shone brightly when you traced your fingers over his features, taking him in. The former Winter Soldier was finally a free man. No longer a slave for Hydra. They smiled knowing you were both happy.

You hovered your mouth close to his, breaths mingled together as one. Soft, lingering touches were given. Making sure the physical contact was never broken.

“Welcome home, James.” You whispered softly to him, kissing him again. He kissed you right back, taking his time to show you how much he was grateful to be home.

_Welcome home_

_Welcome home_

_Without you here, it’s not the same_

_And I’ve been waiting here_

_Welcome home_

**Author's Note:**

> Motionless will be posted later on today! Requests open :) 
> 
> Please let me know what you think, I love hearing from you guys.


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